The Meg

Year : 2018

Genre : Action / Sci Fi / Thriller 

I could count the list of Summer blockbusters this year on one hand. It's been an incredibly quiet one really, and with the exception of Infinity War and MI Fallout, audiences haven't really been treated to much in terms of cinematic spectacle. It stands to reason that given this drought, it wouldn't take much to satisfy an audience that is hungry for leave your brain at home fodder, and this is kind of why 'The Meg' has luckily landed on its feet. Current opening weekend box office takings stand at $32 million, hands down beating  Dwane Johnson's 'Skyscraper' which was released only a few weeks ago, had a similar target audience, and earned comparatively less. 

The plot, as it is, follows a group of scientists who encounter a prehistoric 25 metre long Megalodon shark beneath what was previously considered the deepest part of the ocean, the Mariana trench. Disaster ensues, and as luck would have it, Jason Statham is the only man in the whole of the Far East capable of rescuing their submarine. What follows is a schlocky, tongue firmly in cheek B-movie that knows full well it is a B-movie, and pretends to be nothing else more than that.

It is startling obvious from the outset that Chinese media company Gravity pictures, having invested heavily in the films production, engineered 'The Meg' towards an Asian audience. While there's an argument to be had that the film is simply Speilberg's 'Jaws' on steroids, it's huge monster from the bottom of the sea roots lend themselves far more to Japanese pop culture Gojira aka ‘Godzilla’ than anything that tried to gobble up Richard Dreyfuss in the mid 70's. It is no coincidence that Jason Statham was chosen for the male lead, as bald men are assumed to have high testosterone and be alpha male types in Asian culture. Themes that are important in Asian culture are evident throughout. High achievement and appeasing one's parents play a part in one of the protagonist’s character arcs, and such themes wouldn't even see the light of day in a completely American funded production. There is even a character that has a hairstyle lifted straight out of the Anime series ‘Gundam Wing’.

None of these observations are criticisms, and they make for a refreshing change having not seen much original Asian cinema.  

Driving home following our Sunday afternoon screening of this film, there were a couple of things I felt unhappy with. Statham does his best with what is essentially a very weak script, but the Chinese actors were incredibly wooden, and made no effort whatsoever to raise their game. Whether this is intentional given the nature of the film, or whether they simply can’t deliver performances in anything other than their mother tongue is unclear. I am inclined to think however, it is the latter.

Secondly, and I know this is a bit unfair, but some of the set pieces really do require the audience to suspend disbelief.  Yes, I get that this film isn’t supposed to be taken seriously, but throughout the film’s final act, I sat there thinking that Director John Turteltaub had taken things from the moderately believable, to the ridiculous, to the utterly utterly stupid. If you go into it expecting Jaws with better CGI, you will leave disappointed.

Niggles aside, this is perfectly watchable, and the CGI is particularly impressive too, noticeably better than 2016's 'The Shallows', where although the Spielbergian suspense was there, the CGI let the film down badly. 

Any film where Statham has the chance to punch things is a winner in my book, and 'The Meg' is no exception to the rule.

No Sharknado, but no Jaws either. Three stars.

Ready Player One

Year: 2018

Genre: Science Fiction

HIS opinion

Most of us forget (or had no idea) that virtual reality is in it's second iteration. Technology that was originally released in the very early 90's has had a second bite at the cherry and although it's come on huge leaps and bounds, is still 'not quite there yet'. Much like big screen 3D it still has it's limitations, but we all know that one day technology that completely and utterly immerses the user in another world will be commonplace. 'Ready Player One' envisages that day. 

You'd be forgiven for assuming that Spielberg had moved on from making the crowd pleasing popcorn fests of the eighties and early nineties. Most of his recent work has been heavily politically influenced, and although 2015's 'Bridge of Spies' and more recently 2018's  Oscar nominated 'The Post' have received critical acclaim, you could hardly place them in the same genre as 'Jurassic Park', or 'Jaws'. One glimpse of the Struzanian influences on the poster for 'Ready Player One' though, and the audience knows they are in for a completely difference type of  fairground ride. 

Based on Earnest Cline's 2011 novel and set in 2045, 'Ready Player One' is set in a world I personally found very reminiscent of Neill Blomkamp's 'District 9'. The population has resorted to escaping the desolation of these slum-like cities by engaging in the virtual reality world of the Oasis, a sort of massive multiplayer online world where users have their own avatar and gamer tag. In this world there are three secret keys, coded by one of the original developers and the gamer who finds them gains full ownership of this world combined with a rather large amount of money in the form of company shares. The film's protagonist, Wade Watts, tasks himself with finding these keys and along the way battles a company intent of monetizing the Oasis and profiteering from it's users. Right from the outset, the films sucker punches modern publishers and their drift towards micro transactions will not be missed on the gamer portion of the audience. 

As a purely visual form of entertainment 'Ready Player One' is a success. If there was one regret I would take away from the film it would be that I didn't see it in IMAX 3D. It is simply stunning to look at, and the colour palette it utilities is vast. Start chipping away at the ground breaking CGI however, and cracks start to appear. Character development is almost none existent, and the films protagonist goes through emotional changes that happen so quickly they are comically unrealistic. 

As you may have seen from the trailer, one of the big draws for the film is the number of nods to other franchises it contains. I must admit, this was one of the aspects that drew me towards it as well. The problem with this however, is that Spielberg tries cater for the younger AND older audience members, and what you're left with is references to contemporary Japanese Anime mish-mashed together with films and game consoles from the mid 1970's. It becomes confusing, and the films wanton desire to throw every single character license it could afford at the audience looses it's appeal, very very quickly. 

Over reliance on CGI and lack of focus on character development is sadly the Achilles heel of this film and it really is a shame. We know that it's not that Spielberg can't do it, but in 'Ready Player One' he just seems to want to dazzle younger audience members with cultural references whilst older audience members sit there feeling puzzled. Spielberg need look no further than James Cameron's 'Avatar', a thematically very similar film to see that ground breaking visuals and good character development can, and have gone hand in hand in cinematic history.   

Not disappointing, but a hardly jaw dropping 2.5 out of 5. 

HER opinion

Spoiler warning: plot/ending discussed. Read at your own risk!!!!

I spent this entire film thinking WTF. I knew before watching that I wasn't the target audience, but this turned out to be the biggest understatement ever. In contrast, my teenage nephews - right up their street. I can imagine them talking about it with friends at school for days!

I felt like I was watching a film written for teenagers which wasn't quite sophisticated enough to appeal to a non-video gaming adult audience. I found the storyline hugely predictable, it was almost like watching an episode of Scooby Doo where a gang of kids follow clues to nail the baddie. Especially one of the final scenes involving a police car (trying hard not to drop any spoilers here folks, but it's so predictable you can probably guess what I mean anyway). I almost expected the baddie to utter the immortal 'I'd have gotten away with it if it wasn't for you meddling kids'. In fact he should have - the film missed out on a killer pop culture reference there!!

At times it was cheesy, corny and one huge cliche. I actually groaned at the cheesiness a few times and it brought to mind '50 Shades' - and that's saying something! The big baddie was almost a pantomine villian, especially his corporate-looking avatar and unbelievable password. Oh and don't get me started on one of the other characters - a homage to Garth in 'Wayne's World'?! Hilarious in the 1990s, not quite so in the current day. And what was with the random 'The Shining' scenes??? Isn't 'The Shining' an 18-rated film? Yet 'Ready Player One' is rated 12a, so I don't quite get the mix there. Is the target audience expected to understand the Garth and 'The Shining' references? Or are they aimed at the parents taking their kids to see this at the flicks?

There is a section in the film where characters discuss the possibility that gaming avatars may not be an honest representation of who the players are in real life. But low and behold! Yes, the real people behind the teenage avatars do indeed turn out to be teenagers. Hmm. I understand the film's reluctance to visit the seedy underbelly of this topic, but not quite sure the importance of this mindful messsge will actually stick with the millions of kids watching.

Now, let's find some positives; Couldn't fault the costumes or the cinematography. Very stylish and swish, as expected from a Speilberg blockbuster. And believe it or not, I liked the original premise that the future is distopian so people 'live' in VR instead. I just felt the storyline, script and incessant pop culture references were a little OTT for my liking. The only snippet which held my interest was one character sacrificing themselves and making a hand gesture as they fell. (I am a sucker for self-sacrifice, every time. Whether it's in 'The Walking Dead' or 'Titanic' - you name it, it gets me.)

The ending conveys a message about spending too much time living in video games. Commendable. But somewhat ironic considering the audience has just spent two hours watching a computer game rather than a film. 

I wish I could be more positive about Ready Player One. This review is just my feeble little opinion, after all. I suspect millions will love it and it'll be a rip-roaring success at the box office. It is just not my cup of tea.

Edit - I have just watched the review podcast by BBC film critic Mark Kermode. He said he laughed often, felt uplifted & was emotionally involved with the characters. Humph. I'm obviously missing something here. Shall I give it another chance to win me over? Not on your nelly.

1/5

PS. I feel bad writing such a harsh review. I'm usually an advocate of 'if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all'. Honestly

Peter Rabbit

Year: 2018

Genre : Kids 

I had to twist Mark's arm to see this film and now that we have - I'll be honest - I have mixed feelings. Prepare for a pompous review...

GOOD: 

1. Ignoring the Beatrix Potter heritage, this is an enjoyable stand-alone film in its own right. 
2. The mix of animated and live action characters blends well. No naff or awkward special effects as there are in some of these types of films. 
3. It is funny enough to hold my attention and I chuckled quite a few times. 
4. All but one of the animal voiceovers fit well and sound 'believable'.
5. The bunnies are cute and pigeons are featured. (An underrated bird I always feel gets a raw deal in life.)
6. I enjoyed seeing other BP characters in background cameo roles. A nice touch.

BAD:

1. To link this film to the wonder that is Beatrix Potter's work is such an abomination it is almost blasphimous. The only resembalance is the name of the characters and that Peter Rabbit is naughty. Oh, and Mr McGreggor has a garden. All similarities end there. The story line strays far from the source material, which disappointed me. 
2. There are frequent scenes of (comedic) violence, hardcore partying and even one snippet of a character appearing to be stoned! None of these behaviours ever cracked a mention in any of BP's stories. (Note - I have yet to read the recently-discovered BP story 'Tale of Kitty-in-Boots', so I may be wrong on this. Perhaps I should reserve judement on this point!)
3. The word 'evil' is used a few times, too. I don't think such a strong adjective ever featured in BP's vocabulary.
4. The voiceover of James Cordon is not as well suited as the other animal voiceovers. However, after a while it blends in. It just didn't say 'cute-but-naughty-bunny' to me. 
5. Plus, it felt just plain weird and profoundly wrong seeing PR portrayed in a different illustrator's hand. 

CONCLUSION:

An enjoyable film in its own right if you disregard any BP-related expectations. The film tried too hard to be contemporary and thereby lost the innocence which is the true essence and beauty of BP's stories. And in my opinion, this is why it doesn't match the brilliance of Paddington 2. 

3.5 out of 5